10 weeks along :)
So lately I have been experiencing the fun of pregnancy constipation...however, today was quite the opposite problem if you know what I'm sayin...
So there I was on the toilet and then I get this rush of "Oh my god, I am going to puke now" panic. I grab the only thing I have within reach, the little brown paper bags in public stalls for discarded "feminine products". I start puking the entire bowl of cereal I had ingested and assumed I was fine...NOT SO! Apparently, those bags are not water tight so my puke proceeded to leak ALL over my lap and onto the floor...this in turn made me vomit more because of the mere sight of what was happening. Meanwhile, all the women in the building are rushing in and asking me if I am ok because when I puke, I sound like a rhino that was shot. I do my best to tell them I am ok without hopefully them seeing me covered in my own vomit. They finally leave and I waddle out to grab paper towels to try to clean and salvage what is left of my dignity. I get clean enough that I can at least put my pants back on. I run into my office only to find a male manager waiting for me...looking as embarrassed as ever because he obviously heard me morph into the rhino. I tried to tell him why I was getting sick and he just told me he has seven kids and he knows exactly what I am going through...all the while I am thinking to myself "how the hell do you know EXACTLY what I am going through?" This man has no idea that my undies and pants are one second from being thrown away. I told him that I needed to go home to change and left it at that...what a way to start off the week, eh?
